How To Dm Someone On Discord Without Adding Them

Discord is a widely popular platform for communication among gamers and communities. Whether you want to connect with friends, join a gaming server, or even approach someone with a business proposition, the Direct Message (DM) feature on Discord is your go-to. However, what if you want to slide into someone’s DMs without adding them as a friend on Discord? In this article, I will guide you through the process of sending a DM on Discord without the need for adding the person as a friend. Let’s dive in!

Why DM Someone Without Adding?

Before we delve into the hows and whys of DMing someone on Discord without adding them, let’s understand the reasons why you might want to use this approach. There could be various scenarios where you might want to connect with someone discreetly or without disclosing your identity right away. For example, if you are looking to collaborate with a fellow creator, reaching out without an invitation can be more effective and genuine.

Additionally, if you find a community or server where you have a common interest with someone, but don’t want to send a friend request right off the bat, initiating a DM without adding them can be a great way to break the ice and start a conversation.

Using a Server to DM Someone

The key to DMing someone without adding them on Discord lies within a shared server. If you and the person you want to DM are members of the same server, you can send them a DM without the need for adding them as a friend.

Here’s how you can do it:

  1. Join a Shared Server: First, make sure you are a member of the same server as the person you want to DM. If you haven’t joined the server yet, find an invitation link and click on it to join.
  2. Find Their Username: Once you are in the server, locate the person’s username in the member list or within the chat channels.
  3. Open a DM: Right-click on their username and select “Message.” This will open a direct message window where you can start typing your message.

By following these steps, you can send a DM to someone on Discord without adding them as a friend. Remember, they will receive a notification about your message, and if they choose to respond, you can have a conversation directly in the DM window.

Etiquette and Tips

When DMing someone on Discord without adding them, it is important to maintain proper etiquette and respect their boundaries. Here are some tips to keep in mind:

  • Be polite and introduce yourself: Start the conversation with a friendly and concise introduction, explaining who you are and why you are reaching out.
  • Respect their privacy: If the person does not respond or indicates that they are not interested, respect their decision and do not persistently message them.
  • Keep it professional: If you are reaching out for business or collaboration purposes, maintain a professional tone and clearly state the purpose of your message.
  • Be patient: Not everyone checks their Discord messages frequently, so give the person some time to respond before following up.


DMing someone on Discord without adding them as a friend can be a useful way to connect with others, whether it’s for a casual conversation, collaboration, or joining a community. By following the steps mentioned above and keeping proper etiquette in mind, you can approach someone on Discord without the need for a friend request. Remember, it’s always important to respect someone’s boundaries and privacy, and be mindful of the purpose of your message. Happy DMing!